When you are transitioning from one relationship to another or from the single life to a deeper relationship life, you are choosing to make a big change in your life.
Change is Difficult
We have inertia that tends to keep us doing things the same way we have done them in the past. Some of these ingrained practices have served us well. For example – getting up and getting to work on time. Much of what we habitually do is of little consequence, the brand of shoes we prefer, what we put on a hamburger, etc. Unfortunately, there are also some regular occurrences in our lives that fit into that old definition of insanity of “doing the same thing and expecting different results.” Whether good, bad, or neutral our recurring practices keep moving forward unless some force shifts their direction. It’s as simple as Newtonian physics.
Starting to date changes your life. You will be doing things that you didn’t do before. It feels strange, maybe even scary. Yet, you are doing it. Give yourself a big pat on the back for overcoming inertia.
Change Leads to More Change
Your life is not just a bunch of unrelated practices. Everything you do is related to the other things you do. For example, if you didn’t regularly get to work on time you wouldn’t be able to buy that hamburger while wearing your favorite shoes.
A simplified representation of your naturally complicated life
Think of yourself as one big hanging mobile of the things you are. If you move one piece, others move. If you make one heavier, you permanently shift others. No change is isolated from the others.
“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” Alan Watts
By choosing to date you’ve decided to make a big change to rearrange your life. Realize that this will change many other things in your life. Don’t give up control of those other changes. Imagine how you want your mobile to look, and start tinkering with other pieces of your life until it looks better to you.
It’s a grand opportunity for reinvention.
Here’s a link to an article about personal change in Psychology Today that we think you might enjoy.
And a link to Wonderland Studio on Etsy who offer the mobile above and others. No connection to us – we just thought that they make nice things.